Holding It Together
The kind ob/gyn managed to contact my friend and then invited me to sit down on the blue plastic chair placed against the wall behind her desk. I sat in that chair, rocking forward and back, arms wrapped around my midsection. The rocking was instinctive. I either was attempting to comfort my shattered [...]

Grief Emerges
When the doctor returned to the examining room I was sitting on the table composed but stunned. The questions that bounced around in my brain still couldn’t be asked. My mouth wasn’t ready to engage. This had been my first pregnancy. At the time I didn’t know it would be my last. The [...]

Unexpected Loss
After my first ob/gyn visit I went home still unsure what to think. The 10.5 week old fetus seemed normal but it had developed only to 9.5 weeks and the doctor’s incongruent words, tone, and body language suggested there could be a problem. With that I trusted God with the pregnancy knowing His will [...]

Confirmation and Concern
The first week of April 2001 Steve and I returned to Clarksville, Tennessee. Within days he headed west to Fort Leavenworth, Kansas, for the last phase of school. Although friends invited me to stay with them, I chose to stay home. Besides, I had news I wasn’t willing to share yet, and I [...]